Saturday, April 21, 2007

Unexpected Phone Call

I have been looking for the weekend since the deluge that was dumped on the East Coast earlier in the week. Who would've thought we'd see 70+ temperatures? Mid-week I saw the forecast for the upcoming days and I was so overjoyed. I'm going to dust off my tennis racquet and hit the courts tomorrow with Kwesi.

Well I went out yesterday with a couple of my coworkers yesterday to celebrate the wonderful weather. We wound up going to this trendy bar called Bar 12. What was supposed to be a big group dwindled down to a couple of us, but that was okay; we wound up having fun anyway. So much so that I didn't leave the place to just before 1 in the morning. I'm going for a drink or two always tends to lead to a late night. So you figure I had 3 Gin and Tonics and one Sam Adams. Thanks to great connections I was able to jump on the bus in Manhattan, to take it crosstown and then to jump on a Brooklyn bound train, wake up in time to transfer and then get home: total trip time about an hour--not bad for the MTA on the weekend.

I was on the phone with Al, while she worked on Grad school project, and probably went to bed a little before three.

I wake up at 10. I get a phone call a few minutes later from my father. It was unexpected, because we've had a very up and down relationship. He can be one of my favorite people or number one on my shit list. Well he decided to give me a call today. I think it's been a couple of months since we last spoke, before that maybe a couple of years.

We had all of these philosophical conservations, discussed Ayaan Hirsi Ali (wanted his opinion on her--he being a Muslim), books, life, memories, regrets, and even talked about my relationship with Al, and a lot about the growth in myself over the course of the last few years. We talked for almost two hours. It's funny, because in our relationship I'm almost the parent and he's more of the child. This doesn't mean that I don't respect him. It's just that he looks up to me, now at least, because I've accomplished a lot in my life, and I've done things my own way. So even people like him that weren't sure of who or what I would have become are able to say that they saw something special in me when I was younger.

I told him that he'd better save up some money, because I'd probably be married in the next few years, which shocked him. He said she must be a special lady to tame your heart. I said she was. I told him that she's a special woman and that she has a lot of strength and conviction and that you need someone that will just tell you shut up every once in awhile, LOL. Not that--that has ever happened, as we don't tend to talk to one another in that type of manner. But, I'm sure if she needed to call me on my shit, or silence me for my own good she'd be able to handle that. He wants to meet her. I expected that. My aunt loves Al, so much so that she said I should take her down to meet my other aunt, Shirley, in Florida.

It's so funny when someone asks you what's going on and you tell them you've gotten into graduate school and everything is going pretty well--and you know that someone is so integral in your life--and you are growing in your ability to forgive and let someone that has caused you pain in the past--another chance. Redemption. That's what it's all about.

It feels good to hear your parent say that they are proud of you. It's not the first time that I've heard it from him. It's the first time that I really felt he meant it, and even said I'm proud of how you and your sister turned out, even though I had little to do with it. He's on the true road to recovery, and today I've actually heard it.

I was looking for good weather, I suppose I've gotten that and so much more.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend.



Al said...

that's wonderful sweetheart. to be honest with you, I'm really glad this happened, that you heard your father say these things, because you know he meant them, even if he later says crap (not that he will, but you know how things can be sometimes) you know that when he said this he really meant it from his heart. It makes sense because it's all true :) Love you. Al

Excalibur said...

Thank you, Love. Lets hope he stays the course, LOL.

coldploy said...

In my case, it's the opposite. My parents never say or show their love. I guess it's because of our culture and custom.
Comes to think of it. Perhaps, I should start showing and telling them that I love them. If it wasn't both of them, I wouldn't be here.

Excalibur said...

Just from some of your comments I can see that your parents have instilled so much wisdom in you & you are such a wonderful person that I think they show their love in non-obvious ways.